The Second Time Around - Entry #5

“I sat one evening in my laboratory; the sun had set, and the moon was just rising from the sea; I had not sufficient light for my employment, and I remained idle, in a pause of consideration of whether I should leave my labour for the night, or hasten its conclusion by an unremitting attention to it.” (Shelley 120). I remained solemn at the prospect of creating another monster, “a race of devils would be propagated upon the earth, who might the very existence of the species of man a condition precarious and full of terror.” (121). Who am I, a simple and small human being in relation to the rest of humanity to make their lives of living hell? How can I condemn them to a creature so foul, so hideous, so persuasive; one isn’t even entirely sure he was a monster.
You see, this is when I began to question my perspective. This moment. It was this entire time that I perceived this creature, my creature, to in fact be a monster; an essence incapable of human experience. Yet, when he told me his devastating story, as tragic and vengeful it was; I realized it was I who could have put an end to the entire encounter. If I would have remained by his side, and cared for him, I could have potentially created an educated being, capable of immersing into society; with my aide, I could have introduced him as a scientific project and educated him, had a companion by my side to take on the fame and the glory. If I had would have stayed in my apartment that dreary evening he came to life, I could have hid him or destroyed him or exposed him at my will. Perhaps he would have been like a child or a pet of mine. Thus when I stepped into the role of being his creator, I took on the responsibility of his being; his welfare, his happiness, his existence in its totality, did I not? Yyet I abandoned him and forced him to survive on his own. It is quite similar if I would have left a mere child alone in the woods and expected it to figure life out on its own. Were his actions as his fault as mine? If not more? Am I not more to blame since I am in fact his creator and I let him loose?
This thoughts encompassed me as the moon rose in the sky, leaving uncomfortable emotion of dread and solitude in my apartment. Where am I to go from here? That is when Elizabeth entered my mind. This creation was for me to be with her; for my ability to have love and relations with her. Do I not owe the same respect for my creature? When he asked for his companion, it was not to destroy the planet together; nor was it to have partner in crime. Rather, he professed he would like company; mere satisfaction that he was not the only one of his kind to suffer on this enormous planet. In the very least I owe him companionship of his own kind. If his my relations would have began to a pleasant start, with care and education and introduction, maybe he would have been satisfied with me alone; as a father-son type. But it was my actions and my decisions that ultimately led us to the road we are now.
“Thus situation, employed in the most [rigorous] occupation, immersed in a solitude where nothing could for an instant call my attention from the actual scene in which I was engaged, my spirits became” (120) lightened and warm hearted. While the female creature I was delving into the creation of, was hideous to my eyes, she was a beauty and an art to the creature. The possibility ensued that maybe “she become ten thousand times more malignant than her mate” (120), however, I would need to trust that the creature, one who seems to have grown fond and tender toward us weaker humans, at least for the time being. I would need to trust his ability to protect our kind from whatever havoc this new creature could ensue. “My first intention, to make the being of a gigantic stature” (32), in proportion for the first creature, I created her to about seven feet in height. Similarly, she shared yellow skin and long black hair; sewn together to the be the length to mid-back. It began to rain as my experiment came closer to a finish; “the rain pattered” (35), lightly, “against the panes, and my candle was nearly burnt out, when, by the glimmer of half-extinguished light, I saw” (35) her vibrant yellow eye open. Similar to the first creature, her breathing was “hard, and a convulsive motion agitated its limbs.” (35). I had created his companion; muddled emotions surged my mind. Was this the greatest deed or worst mistake I have ever made? Before I could fathom answering my own question, the beautiful and daunting female creature fled from my apartment, breaking the locked door down.
“I trembled, and my heart failed within me” (121), I had given myself the power to create a living being and instead of thinking of the consequences, I left him completely and utterly alone. My thoughts swarmed with images of my mother, my father, Elizabeth, William, Justine, Henry; the ones that have always been there to pick me up when I have fallen to the lowest stoops of the totem pole. The creature, my creature, has only experience myself and those villagers he became so fond of; and twice he has had his heart ripped to shreds. Thus, I owe him, at the very least, a decent show of happiness and contentment.
“Presently I heard footsteps along the passage” (122), stepping over the damaged door, the first creature appeared. “You have fulfilled your promise, as intended. I will follow her, ensure her protection from herself and the rest of your kind.” His smothered voice, hardly audible, escaped his upright lips. While his smile was devastatingly rotten, it was the first genuine one he has likely experienced. “Promise that humanity will be protected from you both; if any more lives are taken on account of either of you, I will forced to destroy you both.”
“That will not be of concern.” With a quick spin of his heel, he disappeared as quickly as he had appeared. My creations were gone and I was left with shambles to pick up the pieces; hope and regret clouded my mind as I packed for my journey. “Yet when I thought of my beloved Elizabeth”, warmth filled me, I had completed my task. I was free. 

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